They're baaacckkkk....and I couldn't be more excited. Being from New Jersey (central) and proud of it, I have a special affinity for these broads (Jersey term). Let's dive right in, shall we?
1) No more Danielle Staub! Finally. I wish we could get Dina back, but I'll take it. I feel awful for Danielle's kids, however, because she'll never get cancelled from the all-too-real reality show that is their lives.
2) We got two new castmates...both family members of Theresa's. I don't fully understand why only the NJ cast must be rife with people who are related to one another, as opposed to every other Real Housewives program, but I guess we should just go with it. I am really itching to see some unrelated Jersey women interact at one point, but it seems Bravo categorically refuses to do that on this program.
3) Theresa and Joe. Look we all feel for them, right? I mean, Theresa was so humble in earlier seasons
("I would never move into a used house...it's disgusting"), that you just wish for her husband and her to make ooodles and ooodles of money. And, she always seeemed to have her priorities on target ("Gia...forget school..it's time to model and act!"). And she never started trouble, ("Danielle, you don't say hi?"). So, clearly she has gained our sympathy after having revealed she owes over $11 million...wait, what's that? SHE'S STILL LIVING IN THAT MANSION AND DRIVING A MERCEDES?? Fuck that!!!! How on Earth can she continue to live that way when she owes so many millions of dollars to people who will have to do without because she hasn't paid what she's owes them. Don't even for a moment try to tell me that her cookbook and Joe's pizza place are footing the bill for this lifestyle. Not even a remote shot of both combined even paying the mortage and upkeep on that house, let alone on the cars, the kids, the clothes, the trips, the parties and, oh yah, paying off the MILLIONS OF DOLLARS of debt they are in. The fact that they are still in that house is an affront to every one of us who pay our bills and have to learn to live within our means. Where on Earth are they getting that cash and credit from? They supposedly have very little assets and income below $100,000 and crushing debt. Who is supplying them with the money to keep paying on that house?
4) Kathy. I like her. So far. Nothing else to report on....but riding her bike to the store? LOVE it!
5) Melissa...ugh....if I find out she's in the same debt situation as her sister-in-law, I am going to be very upset. And by the way, a 5 year-old should never have a walk-in closet filled with shoes and purposes...no, STOP!...never a reason for that...no justification for it at all.
6) Love me some Caroline (and, of course, Albie) but it's time for her to move on. Haven't her kids been on some elongated path of leaving the nest since the program began? It's been a 2 year-process so far...cut the cord already!
7) Where the hell is my Kim G? I love her. Why is she nowhere to be found?
8) Ashley shows up late to an upaid internship and cries immediately when her Mom gently tries to guide her to do the right thing and then asks for her parents to pay for a Manhattan apartment? Color me shocked. And where's Derek, AKA: the best thing that ever happened to her?
9) The (classy) family throwdown: First, this took place at the Manor, a place many of us who grew up in Jersey have been to many times. My grandparents' 50th anniversary was there. I was 8 years old. I sang a song for them/took my first step out of the closet. Let's not discuss it.
Anyway, the Gorga affair was all class, start to finish. Joe (Theresa's husband) had the runs. Theresa was late. Theresa's brother (from now on will be called "Bro-Joe") drank himself into a borderline coma, told his sister to "Walk the fuck away" called her garbage, needed 10 guys to hold him back from kicking the shit out of his own family, yelled at both his parents...shall I go on? Oh yah, everyone's kids were there to witness it. Just your typical CHRISTENING. O bla dee, O bla da.
Sidenote: It can all look elegant, if only for a moment. The Manor may be overdone, but it's pretty. Everything is done professionally. Say what you want about Jersey girls, this crew, very much including Theresa, puts themselves together quite nicely for these affairs. Everything is done to a tee. But when you hear one of the Joe's belt out, "you want some friggin' lobstah?!!!"...it ruins it. Okay? Just a point of fact.
10) Kathy, loving her even more. First and only thing she did..protect the kids and get them away from the melee. LOVE HER so far.
We've got a whole season to go. Get ready for it...
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